I was raised to be modest, not to boast.

I was raised to be modest, not to boast.

It was okay to be successful but not to shout too loudly about my accomplishments.

From my experience of working with a diverse spectrum of women, I regularly hear similar narratives. I don’t want to play the corporate game. I hate how egos show up at work. I cringe at the thought of boasting about my accomplishments.

I believe this approach comes from several elements. Upbringing, culture, gender stereotypes, and having a strong inner critic.

I see accomplished female leaders, disruptors in their industries, playing small. Acting in a modest way to be accepted.

I understand this and have done the same. I believed that working hard and delivering to a high standard would mean I would be seen and recognised.

And to a point in my career this happened. I was recognised, liked and respected. However, something was missing. Playing small, and relying on others to share my accomplishments, was holding me back from realising my potential impact.

Playing small may seem harmless, however recognising it is a pattern that no longer served me was a significant turning point

I now feel confident to talk openly and share my accomplishments and the impact I am having, but in a way that is humble and authentic to me.

I work with women to be authentic and find their ‘right- size’ for them (Not too small or too big). Here are some of the tools we explore:

-          Know who you are – Your strengths. Your contribution to what is being achieved. So you can talk about what you can bring to support others. Start small - share with your partner or child or friend what you achieved today.

-          Celebrate your successes – This doesn’t have to be shouting from the roof tops. It may be getting your nails done, going for dinner with a best friend, taking the afternoon off. Be intentional in building your confidence and motivation.

-          Talk about what you impact you are having. Focus less on what you did, and more on the impact of your actions for others.

-          Have confidence in what you do – Dial down the inner critic to move out of your comfort zone (coaching has been an important for me to befriend my inner critic.)

-          Don’t resist compliments –Build your capacity to accept genuine praise. It could be a simple as’ Thank you for sharing that.’

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-          Surround yourself with role models – Who do you admire being authentic, owning and talking about what they do and have achieved, whilst impacting those around them.

If this resonates with you, I look forward to helping you explore your ‘right size’. Life is too beautiful to play small and the world needs your impact